Can't Blame A Girl For Trying ;-)

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	Can't Blame A Girl For Trying ;-)
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	Ok - so call me crazy. Maybe I am? Who knows... Nah, really I'm not crazy. Just this is something I feel like I have to do. I dont know why - I've never gone this far to let someone know I was into them before... I should start by telling you how this all came about. About a month ago, I was looking through Yahoo Personals, bored to tears... I came across your profile, and I read it. Was really impressed. Its almost like I had dreamt you to life from what I read. I got this really strong feeling after reading your profile... I knew I had to talk to you. I even told my best friend Danielle "I have got to talk to him!" I hadn't even talked to you yet - but just knew that I had to. So a few times over the past month I've tried to figure out a way to get into contact with you. The other day I finally figured out how and I was estatic. And then last night (5/6) we got to talk... only for 5 minutes, but I was still really excited about it... Call me crazy if you want to... but I've never done anything like this before - lol. I just get this strong feeling about you. I dunno what it is or what it means... But I think it is because you seem to be so much like me and seem to be so much like the guy I've been looking to find for a while now... I think I should tell you about me - about my past relationships - and about anything else that is of importance. That way, maybe you can get to know a little bit about me and get a better idea of who I am....

	Ok - well my dilly page pretty much tells you all there is to know about my likes, dislikes, and musical taste -- http://www.thedilly.com/view.user.wtd?id=97011 -- Even has a little "bio" about me in which I will post here.... 5'2", blonde hair, blue eyes... Single - As Single As They Come!! Easy to get along with... very down to earth. That is, until you do me wrong... I have one child, a little boy who is 6 years old, who I love very much... Originally from NY - grew up there... Took boxing for almost 3 years... I can say all 50 states in alphebetical order... I'm known to be a smart ass at times... Victim of a Catch-22... I tend to convey my answers through looks rather than straight out responses... I've got tattoos - A red and black nautical stars on the back of my hips on each side of my back, and an eeyore tattoo on my right leg right above my ankle...I call things as I see them - If I'm wrong, then prove it... I love milkshakes... I have my own beliefs on things, beliefs that cannot be changed, therfore I do not talk to people about religion or politics - it just leads to raised voices and things said that aren't meant... Completely terrified of spiders and snakes shivers... I have the problem of wanting things that I cannot have... I love music, movies, and sports - Football, Hockey, Nascar, Baseball, College Sports, Xtreme Sports... Became an official Budweiser Brewmaster in November of 2003... I try to pet all dogs I come across... I can color within the lines and I play well with others... I use to eat paste in 1st grade... I brush and floss my teeth daily.. I can set my VCR clock... I once bought 3 shirts from Gap for a total of $4.50... I avoid Wal-Mart at all costs... I use proper grammar most of the time... I love to sing out loud in the car... I enjoy pizza on Friday nights and miss my mom's peanut butter and jelly sandwiches that she always cut into triangles... Also you may be impressed to know that I was the dodgeball champion in 4th grade... I'm anthazagoraphobic - which is the fear or rejection, abandonment, or betrayal... I dont like lies, broken promises, arrogance, immaturity, drama, games, guilt trips, two faced people, or when people throw around the word "love"... I love being held, walking hand in hand, curling up on the couch together and watching tv, walking by and having to touch the other person just because, being kissed, and just overall being happy. I have asked a few good friends of mine that if they could describe me or the kind of person I am, what would they say? Here is their answers (And I saved my favorite one for last - hehe): Nick: What can i say about holly just that shes the greatest person ever shes always there for me no matter what she knows how to turn my frown upside she makes me happy just knowin shes in my life makes me feel complete sometimes i dont know what id do without her there has been some crazy times in my life and if i didnt have her to help me threw them id be lost shes honest shes a sweetheart very beautiful and i dont know what id do without her i even said if we are still single when we are 30 then we r gettin married shit that might happen lol never know but i just want to say shes awesome i love her to death no matter what happens or where life leads us you will always be there in my heart i love you sis never change your a awesome person Heres My Poem To You From Nick:Holly My Friend You Have Stuck By Me Threw Thick & Thin Im Glad To Have A Friend Like You No Matter What We Do What Would Life Be Without A Friend Like You? Someone Who Lets Me Open Up & Send All My Secrets Too Never A Moment Of Judgement Just Heart That's Caring & True Thats's Why Each & Everyday I Find Myslef Thinking Of You You Have Been There Threw Everything Like No One Ever Would Thats Why I Need You In My Life For Good..I Will Love You Holly Threw Thick & Thin No Matter If You Lose Or If You Win I'll Help You Threw It All & I'll Be Threw To Catch You When You Fall I Got Alot Of Faith & Trust & I'll Give You My Life If I Must Here & Together We Will Always Be Bestfriends Just You & Me But As Our Friendship This Poem Has No End More To Be Added Forever Your Friend! Danielle: a true friend! always there for me. a total sweetheart who will do anything for the people she cares about. KJ: I would say that you are SWEET and ADVENTEROUS and LOVING and CARING and HOT and EROTIC and FUNNY and WILD and MY FAVORITE PERSON IN THE WORLD!! and I could go on and on and on...... Lauren: I get along with you so well. I know so much about you and you know so much about me too. You have never been anything but wonderful to me and I appreciate that more than you could ever know. You have helped me soooo much with Michael and helped us pick up the pieces and put them together when I didnt think they could. And I have so much fun with you that sometimes I forget about any problems that are in my life. You are my #1 Chica! Mark: you're beautiful and sweet, and awesome to talk to, and you're a lot of fun, a GREAT girl Eric: Sweet, Easy to talk to, Shy, Quiet... Someone who likes to laugh a lot.... Shanna: I'd say you were my girl! Help me through my bad times. Listen to me when I know I got to be getting on ya nerves. Give me good advice. Never one have judged me or put me down. Have always been a real friend to me. Zack: i would discribe you as a very nice pretty and interesting to talk to Crystal: the only one i trust to give me an honest opinion. the only one i trust to tell my secrets to. the only one who has been there for me through thick and thin. Michael: the bestest female friend in the whole world. you keep me sane. i dont know what i would do with out you. you have helped me and lauren get past so much stuff these past few months that i dont know where we would be if it wasnt for you. whatever guy you end up with in the future is going to be one hell of a lucky guy cause i've seen the way you are when you are with someone. you would give them the world. you would do anything to make that person happy. love ya girl! Kyle: you are a girl with a kind heart thats what makes you really precious If I lost you I dont know what i would doyou are pretty as well inside and out I just love everything bout you holly you are the best Crystal Cavender: Well, I think you are a great person. Describing you in words is hard but here goes....Well, To me you are very trusting, easy to talk to, dependable, Good hearted and A DARN GOOD FRIEND. Ok - so by now you are probably thinking that I am some crazy lonely person... Not true - lol. I'm not crazy, and I'm not lonely... Like I said up above, I've just had this feeling about you - a feeling I've not been able to shake - that is telling me that I've got to talk to you, that you could possibly be the kind of person that I am looking for. So what I am asking you is this... I'm asking you for the chance to talk to you, get to know you, and to go from there. I really think it could be good for the both of us... I've never gone for a guy in this way, or at this extent before - but then again I've never felt like I really had to talk to someone before either...

My first real relationship started when I was 13 years old with a guy named Steven. He was the "popular" guy that all the girls wanted but he chose to be with me. Things were going good with him, given the fact that I was only 13. When I was 15, I got pregnant with my little boy. My parents and I didnt agree on some things so I moved in with Steven and his family. At first everything was great. We all got along wonderful. But things quickly started to change... I had to give up my friends, I couldn't talk to anyone but family on the telephone, there were days where I wouldn't go to school because no one would take me. My ex made me start sleeping on the floor while being pregnant. After the baby was born, it got worse. I went through over 3 years of mental and physical abuse between him and his family. I was going to school full time, working at night, and hardly getting any sleep so that he and I could move out onto our own. The whole time, Steven didnt go to school nor had a job. I dated him for 7 years - from age 13 til age 20. I stuck with it, trying to make it work because of my little boy but it got to the point where I had to get out. The opportunity came when I realized that he was taking my money I had given him to pay bills and was using it to spend on another girlfriend he had. I gave him the chance to stop and work things out but he told me he was going to do what he wanted to. So I left and moved home. It was the better choice anyways, because my life was going downhill being with him. I can get into more details, but I will save that for when I have a chance to personally tell you if you want to hear them.

My next serious relationship lasted only about a year. It was with a guy named Brad who was a marine over at Camp LeJeune. Things were going very well. We even talked about marriage, right down to the little details of it all. When he found out he was getting deployed, that is when I found out he had another girlfriend. The weekends when he supposedly had duty is when he was driving up to see her. So we split up. This one hurt me worse than my last relationship because I fully opened myself up to him and let him into my heart. I was truely in love. It took a while to get over it, and I have. I look back on it now and I realize that while I'm happy to have had the time with him, I think it was for the best.

My third relationship was with Brian and it was on the way to being serious. Until his ex showed back up in the picture. Turns out he was still hung up on her, and he couldn't get over her so he wanted to "chase her" - go after her - see if he could have another chance. I stood back and let him go. Didnt try to make him stay because I knew its not what he wanted.

So as you can tell - I've been hurt a few times in the past.

God Bless America & The Troops Over Seas:

*Spc. Nick Carter*

*Erick Wyatt*

*Jason White*